So just like when I start belting a song out at the top of my lungs in my car and my 8-year-old son says, “Mom, just don’t”, I’m here to tell you ladies, when it comes to not using a lubricant, just don’t!
1) Let’s look at the structural reasons. When you don’t use a lubricant, you can cause microtears, or even not-so-micro tears in the lining of your vagina. Ouch! Hopefully enough said
2) Intimate reasons. If sex is better for you, it’s better for your partner too. Win-win!
Now, let’s address some reasons why we might be avoiding it.
It can be awkward to take a moment to get it out and apply it. It can be hard to ask for what we need, but this is important and you are worth it. Plus, see #2 above! Some of us (not me of course) may not want to face that we are getting a little older and aren’t always as ready as we’d like to be. Some of us may not really know our bodies enough to realize that we have a dry, liquid to the point of runny, and clumpy time of our cycle that are totally normal.
Did I lose half of you when I said clumpy? Two-thirds? Stay with me ladies! We have to get over ourselves. We have no reason to be shy, embarrassed or awkward about any of this. It’s our bodies, everything has a purpose and a rhythm to it and if you’d like your rhythm to stay pumping, get some good lube!
My personal favorites are: Slippery Stuff which was recommended by numerous clients as being good for sensitive skin and is sold online as well as in Walgreens and some Walmarts. Personal Gel sold at Sprouts, which is natural and made with organic aloe, and a new one on my radar is Sylk, which I plan to try as it is totally natural, uses kiwi from New Zealand and has a great consistency. Right now, they are also donating 10 cents from every bottle to cancer research and if you go online, there is a 15% coupon for your first order. I also like that they have an office right here in Arizona. www.sylkusa.com
All that I have mentioned are non-staining, unscented, paraben-free, and safe with condoms (“condoms (insert gasp) what are those?” that’s for another post!)
As a pelvic floor therapist, I can tell you that increased inflammation can become problematic fairly quickly and contributes to symptoms related to vaginismus, painful sex and worsening of the dryness. Best to avoid it early on. Having satisfying, pleasurable sex is an important part of a healthy committed relationship and using lubricant that is natural, safe and works well can be a critical piece of that equation. Take care of yourselves!